On The Science Of Rotting In Hell

So, as you may guess, as an outspoken atheist, I am often told to go to hell... For a while this was restricted to comments in forums, and then occasionally on Facebook, then in emails, and eventually in meatspace (real-life). But something has always bothered me when someone tells me to rot in hell.... Not the fact that they are simply verbally harassing me (I have been called much worse), but because I don't think you would rot in hell. And I'll tell you why. SCIENCE!!!

Now, I have only ever been told that I was going to hell by christians. Sadly, this casts a negative shadow on christians (the vast majority of whom would never say such a thing), but it does mean that I only have to counter the christian idea of hell. Normally it is hard to argue things about the bible, due to the contradictions in the bible (there are quite a few), but the christian idea of hell (according to the bible) is relatively straight forward. The basic gist is that it is hot, and there is a lot of fire.... 

Credit to bible.org for this wonderful list of ways I will be burned after death....

Now, while as pleasant as all this lake of fire talk is, there is one point which should be gleamed (or at lease that I gleamed). Hell is incredibly hot. So hot, in fact, that you will not rot. For you see, rotting is a well known, well documented, and highly understood biologic process. And step two of five in the rotting process, Bloat, requires the natural drastic increase in microbiotic activity within the (recently dead) body. If this step does not occur, rot CANNOT occur. And if you are so hot that that microbiotic life can no longer survive (lake of fire anyone) you will not rot. You could steam and cook (in cases of wet heat) or you may mummify (if its a dry heat)....

"Its a dry heat, they said, you wont feel it, they said"

But you would not rot. So, when I point out to people that I would not actually rot in hell, that I would cook, they point out that god can do anything.  

My question is this: If god can do anything, why would he punish me for eternity? 

Why wouldn't he simply correct my behavior through magic-god-powers? 

Why would he not only keep me alive for eternity in order to punish me, but also bend the laws of nature to make my punishment slightly worse?  

They don't usually have a good response....

Harry would never use his magic powers to eternally punish me!

As always, if you have anything to add to the conversation, just comment below!